tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize