Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
