Is it normal to miss your booty call?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize
