dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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