Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
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