we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
