Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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