You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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