Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
