I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Randomize