can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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