Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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