there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize