I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
