At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize