am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
why do cheetos always look like penises
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize
