I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
