if you like me you must not know who I am
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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