You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Randomize
