Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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