We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
