Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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