I'm going to jail i love you
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Randomize
