I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
