This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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