If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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