Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
