I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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