last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
