Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
