how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
