why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I need moral support for this bender
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
