I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
