I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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