I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
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