I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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