Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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