You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
