Cold hands, warm shart.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
