yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize