I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
