She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
