there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
