Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
