Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize