the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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