I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
