There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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