is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize