which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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