Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
